Do you have critical voices in your head? Thoughts that tell you that you’re not good enough, worthy enough, attractive enough, lovable enough or smart enough to succeed in life? Welcome to the Inner Critical World. Many of us have adopted these voices from parents or other people from our past, and these critical inner voices keep us from fulfilling our full potential.
Now, there’s a way to take charge over your negative thoughts and live a life of freedom and triumph, through the use of Voice Therapy, as pioneered by esteemed psychologist Lisa Firestone and her distinguished father, psychologist Robert Firestone.
Here are some tips:
1. Identify the Voice: In a journal or tablet give it a name, maybe the critical inner voice a name, perhaps, “Loveless Lucy (you’ll never find love),” or “Broke Bob (you will never make money),” and even draw a figure representing it. Recognize that this critical voice may be temporarily in your head, but it is not you.
2. Talk Back to the Voice: Tell the voice to “Get out.” Say to it, “I am lovable and will find love.” “I can be rich in both material and spiritual ways.” The more you talk back to the critical voices in a firm, yet strong way, the more you can diminish their influence in your mind.
3. Realize the Myth of the Friendly Critical Voice: At first when you start to separate yourself from the negative thoughts, part of your mind will feel uncomfortable and even lonely. After all, these self-defeating thoughts have been with you for many years; you may even weirdly see them as friends. But they are not friends or friendly; they only want your demise. Tell yourself that these thoughts are your enemies, and that you will banish them from your mind forever.
4. Find Your Personal Meaning: One of the best ways to banish critical inner voices is to find a personal passion or mission that drives you. Maybe, you want to help animals, children, or the homeless. Perhaps, you want to write a book, start a business, develop a new technological advance. Or, you simply want to be a great parent, spouse, or friend. Whatever your personal meaning is, focus on that, and you will find your mind growing stronger with life-affirming, positive, and loving thoughts.
5. Extend Loving Energy Without Expectation: One of the greatest antidotes to fear and sadness is to extend loving energy without expectation. Be kind to others—smile, compliment them, help them in practical matters. Be a good listener, donate, give advice if asked. When you love others without expecting anything in return, you liberate yourself from the fear of being rejected or criticized. Love simply flows from you outwardly and returns to you in the same way.
There is good news: You can master your critical inner voices and live free of their influence. Take control of your mind, and the rest of your life will be cheery, joyful, and loving. Your effort will create effortlessness as you live the life you were meant to live.
For more information, listen to our podcast, CONQUER YOUR CRITICAL INNER VOICE: SPECIAL GUEST: LISA FIRESTONE, PIONEER OF VOICE THERAPY